Guru Header

Memoirs of a Lunatic

The title almost says it all. I'm a little insane, like all folks, and I'm just putting down what I think about. Maybe some of it is funny, maybe some of it isn't. Just come read and find out for yourself.

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Harold and Kumar

On Monday, Lo and I watched Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle. I had heard that it was funny, so I decided to check it out.

While I laughed throughout the movie, the best part - far and away - were the scenes with and about Neil Patrick Harris. He was a riot.

Harold and Kumar with NPH

Harold: Neil, you wouldn't happen to know how to get on the highway from here, would you?
Neil Patrick Harris: Dude, I don't even know where the f**k I am right now. I was at this party earlier tonight and some guy hooked me up with this incredible "X" - next thing I know I'm being thrown out of a moving car. I've been trippin' balls ever since.
Kumar: That's crazy, dude. We've been having a pretty crazy, night, too. We've just been driving around looking for White Castle but we keep getting sidetracked.
Neil Patrick Harris: Yeah, dude, you fascinate me. Forget White Castle, let's go get some p*ssy!
Harold: Huh?
Neil Patrick Harris: It's a f**king sausage fest in here, bros. Let's get some poontang, THEN we'll go to White Castle.
Kumar: No, Neil, you don't understand. We've been craving these burgers all night.
Neil Patrick Harris: Yeah, I've been craving burgers, too. Furburgers. Come on, dudes, let's pick up some trim at a strip club. The Doogie line always works on strippers.
Neil Patrick Harris: Lapdance...
Kumar: [pause] There's a gas station. I'm gonaa see if I can get some directions.
Neil Patrick Harris: You don't need dir- gah! Hurry up, dudes, hurry up! I'm losing wood.

Neil then proceeds to lick the seat and grind his hips against it. He then steals the car.

When they report it later, the cop chastises them and says, "Hey, NPH wouldn't do that, all right?"

When Harold and Kumar meet up with Neil later, he pays them back by buying their meal. When they protest about how stealing the car messed up their night, Neil replies, "Yeah, it was a dick move on my part. That's why I'm paying for your meal." He also gives them $200.00 to clean up where he "made some love stains in the back seat."

It was crazy comedy gold! There is also another H & K moving coming out in 2007, Harold and Kumar go to Amsterdam, picking up right where this one left off. Just like this one, I may not see it until 2 years after its release, but it will probably be worth a few laughs.


At 5/31/2006 11:15 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

G has been trying to talk me into seeing this movie...I'm still not convenced.

At 5/31/2006 11:21 AM, Blogger Witness Street said...

Yeah H&K is pretty crazy all right. While this won't revive in any way NPH's career, there's always that car seat scene to remember him by.

At 5/31/2006 11:36 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Trin: Yeah, I don't think you'd like this movie too much. You aren't one who appreciates the dumb humor too much.

Witness: Well, Doogie IS starring in How I Met Your Mother on CBS. I also now really want to go pick up Doogie on DVD.

I just read that had Doogie not been cancelled after season 4, that season 5 would have been the last one and Doogie would have gotten disillusioned with medicine and became a writer. This from the creator of the show, on his commentary on those DVDs.

At 5/31/2006 12:08 PM, Blogger Gooey said...

Harold and Kumar is one of my favorite movies. I'm usually not for retarded comedy movies like this, but I found myself laughing my ass off the whole time.

Katie Holmes is a nice, well-to-do girl . . . and I'm gonna see her boobies! All the while taking hits from a bong made out of a Ram's horn!

At 5/31/2006 11:44 PM, Blogger MC said...

I think you either like H&K or you don't. I happen to like it... especially Kumar's weed fantasy.

At 5/31/2006 11:56 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

I would so read this but I eventually intend to see that movie. Then I can laugh with you. ;)

At 6/01/2006 9:24 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

I hope you're happy, Guru. You made me watch that movie twice last night.

My allergies are messing with me right now. Maybe I'll dope up on some allergie meds, and watch it. Might be even more funny that way.

At 9/05/2006 9:24 PM, Blogger Captain Oats said...

hey there, nice blog.. found it via google searcing for other h&k fans

im doing an interview with one of the writers of the movie and have opened up questions to the masses here:

thought you might be interested.. and wait til you see what NPH will be up to in the sequel. pretty awesome stuff.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Great Meal

On Sunday, we went to the Texas Roadhouse for some lunch. I got a steak, fries, and a baked potato.

Before the meal, I ate mad peanuts and rolls. The waiter brought two trays of rolls from the get-go and kept up with the rolls and refills all meal long.

In fact, besides the fact that the food was all so phenomenal, the fact that the waiter was so awesomely attentive made the experience top notch. It wasn't that the restaurant wasn't busy, either. They were packed. He was just "on it".

My day was so made that I left him a very generous tip and made sure to get a manager on the way out to ensure that he was aware of the service that I received. I made sure to state that it was the best service I've received anywhere in a long time.

I'll probably follow it up with a letter, as well, just to make sure that Eric G. is recognized.

Man, I love good food and good service!


At 5/30/2006 10:51 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

Hmmmmm, TR rolls!!!!!!

At 5/30/2006 9:10 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

This reminds me of the first time I went to a restaurant called Sweetwater Tavern. We had never experienced service that efficient before that night.

When we first got there, we heard that the wait was 1.5 hours (which is pretty typical for them). The hostess saw that we weren't prepared to wait anywhere near that long so she practically moved the moon and stars just to get us seated. Then the wait staff was ready to go the moment we sat down. The food and drink refills came out prompt and perfect and of course we left a big tip.

Heartbreaking to report, but the place has gone downhill since then. Guess that's the way of the world?

At 5/30/2006 11:46 PM, Blogger ghraper said...

God Bless Texas!!! (Roadhouse that is.)

At 5/31/2006 11:46 AM, Blogger Kristi said...

Yeah! Thank you for rewarding good service.

I am a server part time, so I appreciate that some people still appreciate good service.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Monday, May 29, 2006


Air Conditioner Unit

Man, oh man. Big thanks to the G for coming over and fixing our AC unit. He is a maintenance guy in our apartment complex, but ACs are not emergencies, so we would have been out of luck until tomorrow. We had been roasting in our house with temps upstairs of over 90.

G heard our plight and had mercy on us and came over and fixed it. We were 2lbs low on our refrigerant, so he charged that back up and fixed the leak that allowed that to happen in the first place. Now, it is like 68 in here with all kinds of fans going.

I should be able to get a great night's sleep tonight, all thanks to G-man.


At 5/29/2006 10:15 PM, Blogger ghraper said...

You are welcome kind sir.

At 5/30/2006 9:10 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

There's almost NOTHING more torturous than trying to sleep in a sauna. I totally feel your pain, Guru.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Sunday, May 28, 2006

I Did It Again

Despite all of my best efforts, I found myself working on my homework this evening right up to the last possible minute. Why do I procrastinate so? Is it because I despise writing and this work that I put off was all for my writing class? Maybe I'm getting warm there...

If it wasn't for the fact that I already have thousands invested in my education, I probably wouldn't even complete this degree right now. But, I hate to waste money and the freaking masters that I will ultimately get will serve me for something in the future, I just know it.

Plus I have to remember, I want to set a good example for my kids and be a lifetime learner. See, I'm feeling better already. I just needed to hype myself up after some brutal writing assignments from the Prof.

Happy Weekend End.


At 5/29/2006 9:06 AM, Blogger Witness Street said...

I feel you man. Writing is never as fun with deadlines and profs and tuition expenditures to throw you off. :)

At 5/29/2006 10:00 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

Don't worry about it. Nearly every program I did for my Java class I did in the 3.5 hours I had before the class, and they all worked out just fine. Ended up getting an A- in the class.

I also managed to write a five page paper for a humanities class two hours before the class started, and while in another class! All without suffering any set-backs. Got a B+ on the paper, too.

If you're getting good grades on the homework, don't worry about it. I know that it can feel rushed and hurried because it's, "last minute," but if you can pull it off, then it doesn't matter. Hell, I think I work better under pressure.

At 5/31/2006 10:24 PM, Blogger A Woman From Illinois said...

I agree with Gooey, and all my papers were better under pressure.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Saturday, May 27, 2006


Last night the family went camping. Not go-sit-in-a-camper camping, pitch-a-tent-and-be-rugged camping. Here are some shots of our (borrowed) tent. It was pretty nice as tents go.
Our Tent Front Our Tent Back

We left the little man with grandma so that we wouldn't have to worry about him all over the muddy campground. The girls, though, had a blast and wanted to stay another night. Here they are having a good time.
My Oldest My younger daughter

We went and explored a creek and they really enjoyed it. The other two girls are the daughters of the friends that we went camping with. My oldest loved to carry their youngest around the "treacherous" spots.
Fun at the creek

Here are some shots of my friend Alex and my crowning achievement... fire! We had a tough time because everything was so damp, but we overcame. The secret was in the cardboard from the case of pop, which burned longer than paper and gave the kindling wood enough time to dry out and burn. Once that happened, we were golden. We burned everything we could find. It was a killer good time!
Fire Fire

Our family probably will undertake something like this again, but also at a nicer campground. This one was a liiiitle too 'billy for me. Perhaps next time, we'll pitch our tent at a KOA. I've had good experiences there in the past.


At 5/27/2006 9:38 PM, Blogger loelsh said...

It was actually pretty fun. We definately need to go again sometime.

At 5/27/2006 10:01 PM, Blogger Gooey said...

Next time, take some dryer lint in a paper bag with you. The lint is great for getting fires started, especially if it's damp outside.

At 5/27/2006 10:09 PM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

Ahh, I love to go camping...especially when an indoor pool is involved!!!

At 5/29/2006 12:00 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Lo: Yeah it was.

Gooey: I had heard that before. Good tip.

Trin: Uhhh. I don't think I can even comment on that! :-) Except for that one, and this one right here. Que?


Post a Comment

<< Home

Friday, May 26, 2006

Take Me Out...

Last night I took my two girls to a Columbus Clippers baseball game. We got free tickets and were excited to get out there. My friend Alex was supposed to go with his girls, too, but with the threat of a thunderstorm (and his one daughter's fear of them), he elected not to.

I wasn't going to go, either, but the girls really wanted to go, so we headed out. It started to drizzle lightly as we arrived, but as our seats were under an awning, we were undaunted. We got two large pops, peanuts, and nachos. My oldest ate all of the nachos herself.

Here is our view of the game:
Free Image Hosting at

(As an extra note, I ran into a girl that I had 2 math classes with at OSU. Small world!)

The Clippers were not playing well and were losing the game 3 to zip. After the top half of the 5th inning, the rain started really coming down and they rushed to get the tarp out.

Free Image Hosting at

Before they were even finished, it started pouring hardcore. All the grey and blur here is exactly what we could see from our seats.

Free Image Hosting at

Rain was blowing in on us from everywhere. My younger daughter got a little bit scared from all of the noise (people and constant thunder) and the confusion going on. I think my friend made the right choice not to go!

Even with how it ended, we all had a great time and I'm happy we went. We've got more family goodness planned for tonight, and I'll probably blog about that tomorrow.

Happy Friday!


At 5/26/2006 3:09 PM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

Oh yes, I can't wait to take the boy to dime a dog much fun!!!

At 5/31/2006 11:47 AM, Blogger Kristi said...


Dime a dog night. I miss Columbus.

That is almost as good as drinking beer at the zoo.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Idol Finale

So, last night was the finale. Taylor won. Big freaking deal. I don't care about that. The rest of the show was incredible. Remember the first year, when they spent time in the dressing rooms with the idols and had all kinds of boring crap? Not this year. They went BIG this year.

Best moment had to be when that guy who looked like old Clay Aiken came out to sing and the real Clay was came out behind him. Then when fake Clay saw it, he freaked out. It will be on YouTube or Google Video soon, so if you haven't seen it, you need to find it. It is so funny. (Note: I read a blog today that compared Clay's new hair to Amanda Bynes in She's the Man. I think they are right.)

Toni Braxton was bad. She couldn't muster enough breath to get more than the first musical syllable out (Ih... Then, she was giving Taylor a lapdance on stage. What happened Toni?

I was glad to see my Melissa McGee again. She was, in my opinion, the hottest girl in the top 12 and she sings better than Pick Pickler, so she should have been around longer. Did anyone see Lisa Tucker almost lose it when Kevin Covais sang that he wanted to kiss "your lips"? Classic.

Anyone watch? Questions, comments, concerns?


At 5/25/2006 9:51 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

Poseidon Adventure was on AMC last night, so I flipped over to AI during commericals...and was bored out of my mind!

And they had Prince on (or whatever his name is now)?! Gross!!! So I made sure to catch the last 5 minutes of the show just to see who won, and then I turned back to my movie since I really didn't care to hear any more of Taylor's voice.

Btw, I am glad he won though...we were due for a guy to win.

At 5/25/2006 9:56 AM, Blogger loelsh said...

Yea for Taylor! I wasn't a big fan of him at first, but he grew on me throughout the season. I was definately rooting for him over Kat.

I was not liking Clay's new 'do! Sorry, Clay, that was just NOT working. I think that the Amanda Bynes comparison is pretty accurate. That guy's reaction was quite entertaining.

And don't you mean when Kevin Covais sang "kith your puthy cat lipth"?

Oh, and you forgot to mention that terrible, terrible, horrific flat note Dionne Warwick hit at the very end of that last song! Whoa, Nellie, that was bad!

At 5/25/2006 10:01 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

I think Taylor was a good singer, much better than McPhee. I just like his upbeat attitude and how he constantly went out into the crowd to sing. Sometimes it's not all about singing, but how you perform as well, and Taylor delivered a lot of great performances at the end.

I think the performance I hated the most was McPhee singing with Meatloaf. They both took what was otherwise a good song, and butchered it to hell.

At 5/25/2006 10:31 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Trin: It was really very good. I actually could have done without some of the singing, it was all about the goofing off. I don't think catching 2 or 3 minutes out of context would have been very interesting, either.

Lo: That's exactly what I meant.

Gooey: He does have energy, but who knows if that will translate to album sales? He may end up like the Grateful Dead or something where everyone goes to his shows but his albums don't get any airplay or decent sales. However, there is money to be made in concerts!

At 5/25/2006 10:45 AM, Blogger Princess21 said...

I was impressed this year!!! It was actually a really good show!!!

I was dying during Kevin's song!!! OMGoodness!! :)

My favorite part was CHRIS!!!


Post a Comment

<< Home

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

House Finale

First, let me say that I HATE cliffhangers. Aaargh. Other than that, this was a pretty entertaining House episode. I'm going to do some spoilering, so beware.

For you who watched it, how long until you figured out that the whole thing (after the shooting) was a delusion? I got it with like 20 mins left in the episode or so. I yelled it out and my oldest daughter who was watching it with me (she thinks it is "interesting") was a little bit jarred by my sudden outburst.

House went ahead and requested the treatment to "reboot" his brain. And, we still don't know how the bullet injuries are going to turn out. Since we are having another season, he'll obviously live, but I wonder if they'll take the leg pain away. Maybe they plan on having him fight that Vicodin addiction because then he'll have no medical reason to take it.

They can do what they want with the leg (amputate it for all I care), but they just need to not give him mental illness. I'm afraid that would ruin the show. I was already getting sick of the in and out of the delusions in his delusion. I don't want a whole season with it.

What about any of you? Thoughts about the finale of my favorite show on TV?


At 5/24/2006 2:48 PM, Blogger Princess21 said...

It took me a while to figure out what was going on. I did not realize the WHOLE time after the shooting was a delusion! That was interesting!

I thought it was a great show. A great season finale......but I hate cliffhangers.....but that is what season finales are all you HAVE to watch next season!!

I will deff tune in and see what happens next!! I totally luv this show and dr. house!!! I hope they can at least lessen his pain....but more delusions!!! Especially ones where someone's eye explodes!!! Ewwwwww!!!


Post a Comment

<< Home

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Third Post of the Day

Yes, I know the first two just contained pictures, but still.

This morning is going well so far. I got up early, am going to have time to cut my hair, and have had time to actually upload those pictures that I was holding on to in order to post them.

After I get work out of the way today, I am looking forward to TV tonight. I know that is sad, but such is my life. It is probably why I'm fat. Anyway, American Idol Finale is on tonight (which I probably shouldn't watch all of, but will anyway) and the House Finale is on tonight also. I'm very excited.

I also might try to watch the Desperate Housewives season finale that I have DVRed from Sunday. I know what happens already because I was listening to it on Sunday, but I haven't seen it because I was doing my homework at the time. So, I hope to knock it out tonight, as well.

Viva la TV!


At 5/23/2006 8:15 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

Oh yeah, American Idol. I forgot that it was still on.

At 5/23/2006 9:19 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Yeah, I couldn't be more disinterested about it. My favorite, Chris, is out. Then, I adopted Elliott, and he is out.

Maybe I should root for McPhee so she'll lose, too! She annoys the crap out of me, which is why she'll probably win.

Yep, it is all about me.

At 5/23/2006 9:28 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

I'm hoping Taylor will win only because it's time for a guy to get the title...but that doesn't mean I like him.

At 5/23/2006 11:25 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

Elliot sucked. To be honest, other than him looking like he constantly has to take a shit when he sings, I think Taylor did a very good job last week.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Funny Cartoon

Warning: Potentially offensive material to follow.

Today's Cartoon


At 5/23/2006 10:08 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

Wow, is this your focus for the day? ^_^

At 5/23/2006 11:11 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Not intentionally, but I do love the occasional "adult" humor.

I forgot to add the disclaimer that this has not ever happened to me :-)

At 5/23/2006 9:19 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

Wait...offensive to WHOM?

At 5/24/2006 1:14 PM, Blogger Guru said...

Nicole: Saying "penis" can offend people. I just wanted to be careful, in case someone didn't like the word "penis". You can never be too careful when you utter "penis".

Though "penis" is the medical term, "penis" isn't said too often in polite company, so I wanted to warn people that the word "penis" was to come (I said come, right after "penis" :-P )

At 5/26/2006 6:21 PM, Blogger MC said...

The sad thing is: that happens every day.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Some Interesting Nature Photos

Free Image Hosting at Free Image Hosting at Free Image Hosting at Free Image Hosting at Free Image Hosting at Free Image Hosting at Free Image Hosting at


At 5/23/2006 8:16 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

Hmmm, those carrots look good!!!

At 5/23/2006 9:18 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

BWAHAHA!!! Hilarious.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Monday, May 22, 2006

It's Monday

I almost didn't want to go to work today. After the weekend I had, I wanted to kick back and have a relaxation day. But, I elected to not waste a sick day and go in anyway. I'm glad I did, because today was a pretty good day.

I had plenty of work to do, I was slangin code and it was behavin' and the time went by quickly.

On top of that, I had my MP3 player and listened to Jay-Z's Black Album and Notorious B.I.G.'s Life After Death double album over and over again. Actually, I've been listening to those two for over a week. They are some of my favorite rap albums of all time.

Maybe sometime, I'll list my top 10 rap albums of all time, but for now... I must get.


At 5/22/2006 4:09 PM, Blogger Princess21 said...


At 5/22/2006 6:36 PM, Blogger Angel said...

Being a mom is hard but I definitely do not miss the 9-5 grind. I hate, hate being scheduled. It makes me crazzzy.

At 5/23/2006 9:17 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

Can I just say again how HILARIOUS it is that you listen to Jay-Z and Big? Tickles me to no end!


Post a Comment

<< Home

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Another Long Day

Today kicked my butt. I got to church at 8:30am, played bass at practice and two services, went to lunch, came home, finished up a side job from yesterday, and then did homework for the last six hours. I am a deady deaderson.

An interesting note, the guy I was side-jobbing at the last few days is a Michigan fan. He even has a Michigan mousepad which I photographed with me giving my opinion of the team.


Muck Fichigan


Post a Comment

<< Home

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Where Did the Day Go?

Man, it is almost midnight and I haven't blogged yet. My day has just blown by.

I started off the day doing a some work for my side business, then followed it up with a business-sponsored lunch. I had a steak and it was very good.

Then, I came home and did more homework. I wrote my papers for my MIS 300 class, but I still have all of the week's work in my COMM 320 and COMP 111 classes to do by tomorrow night. Aargh! Why do I pack myself so busy?

After that, I had dinner with my family and watched a movie and some of our DVRed stuff with my wife. Then, it was upstairs to do this and go to bed. Day over.

Tomorrow is church. It is my week to play bass again, so I will be there from 8:30am to about 12:30pm. Then, I have a small piece of work to finish from the side business job today, then I have to buckle down and finish my homework.

Weekends just aren't fun anymore.

Rant off.


At 5/21/2006 10:03 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

Sunday's almost over yet I can't say WHEN I'll be able to blog again! Ugh, this busy thing really isn't working for me.

And I understand what you mean about the weekends not being fun anymore. Especially not when they're packed with all kinds of errands and obligations. Hopefully you'll get some Guru-full weekends soon.

Incredibly lame, that was...


Post a Comment

<< Home

Friday, May 19, 2006

The Work Week - Geek Alert

This entire week was spent working on a client's Access database. It isn't the sexy C# development that I had been doing, but in a small company like the one I work for, you do what the client needs, and they needed an Access database worked on.

I don't have anything against Access, per se, and it does have some nice features. The thing that I hate most is that it takes too many steps to run an ad hoc query against a table and that you have to program against it in VBA.

Oh, man, I hate VB syntax languages. I used to be all about VBScript and VB and VBA, but since I've gotten into the C family of languages, programming in the VB family just drives me up a wall.

Now, I programatically think in C style syntax and I have to make a line by line conversion to VB to make anything work. I had to look up tons of syntax on Google to get through.

Getting away from my VB nightmare, one bonus is that I got to write a wicked long SQL query. Printed out, it would have been several pages long. I manipulated the crap out of the data, working mad logic all over the place. It took almost 3 days to understand the data, work out the logic, code, and test that sucker. THAT was the most fun I had all week.

I warned you there was a geek alert!


At 5/20/2006 4:13 PM, Blogger Ashburnite said...

BlogMad hit!

At 5/20/2006 10:09 PM, Blogger Ashburnite said...

another BlogMad hit!

At 5/20/2006 10:50 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

I don't call it "geek". I call it GENIUS!

Mainly because I have no idea of what you're talking about. ;)

At 5/22/2006 11:00 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Ash1 and 2: It is nice to see that someone is seeing my blog at BlogMad. With not a lot of comments, I have to rely on my statcounters to know that they were there. Thanks for commenting!

Nicole: Come on. Genius is too ... well, Genius sounds right. Tell me more! :-)


Post a Comment

<< Home

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Tuesday's House

The House episode this week was pretty good. I'm excited for next week's finale, though I don't know that I am excited to see House get shot.

I'll tell you what was exciting. Cuddy's backside. She certainly has a nice looking body and I hope that she and House get together. At least for the sperm donation. He seemed to want that, but told her to "Get somebody that she likes". I think he hopes she'll pick him, thereby admitting that she liked him.

Here are some interesting House facts. I hope that I didn't post them before.

The show's creator, David Shore, has said in an interview that the character of Dr. House is partly inspired by Sherlock Holmes. Among the characteristics the two characters share are their ability to come to rapid conclusions after the briefest examination of a client/patient, their drug use (cocaine and heroin for Holmes, Vicodin for House), and the fact that each character has only one real friend (Watson and Wilson, respectively) who connects the cerebral hero to human concerns. (The drug Vicodin is often distributed by Watson Laboratories, Inc., with Watson written on the backside of each pill.) Also, in one episode House's apartment number is revealed to be 221B, Sherlock Holmes's Baker Street address. Additionally, David Shore has confirmed that the name "House" is a pun on "Holmes" ("Homes").

In a strange coincidence, an early Arthur Conan Doyle story, The Mystery of Uncle Jeremy's Household, which may have served as a basis for the later Holmes stories, one of the detective characters is named "Hugh Lawrence" (Hugh Laurie plays House).


At 5/18/2006 5:09 PM, Blogger Princess21 said...

I luv House!!! Please don't die!!! But if you do...can you do it in your sarcastic and strange way??? But...please don't die!!!

At 5/19/2006 11:04 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

If FOX kills this show I'm going to be uber pissed. They killed Arrested Development, one of this most critically accalimed comedies on TV, and if they kill House, I'm going to kill Rupert Murdoch. I'm tired of FOX getting award winning shows and killing them when they start to get really good.

At 5/19/2006 3:31 PM, Blogger Guru said...

I'm sorry. Apparently, I mislead you guys. House is getting shot, but he is okay. The episode will deal with why this guy (former House patient) shoots him. The show is already renewed for 2006-2007 and will be on at 8pm on Tuesdays (probably until Idol starts up again).

My old boss was a huge Arrested Development fan. Critics loved it and it was a cult classic, but the problem was that no one watched it. Ratings stunk. As we've discussed here before, blame America, because they apparently don't appreciate quality.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Grey Finale

Okay, after my gaffe, I finally caught up last night and saw the "17 Seconds" episode of Grey's Anatomy so now the gaps in the finale are finally filled in.

I wonder if Izzie is leaving the show for real (maybe because Katherine Heigl wants to do something else) or if it is just for drama? I hope she stays. I'll say this, though, her little fit that made Denny go along with it was killing Lo and I. I realize the situation, but DAG!

I can't believe how mad I am about the Meredith and Derek thing. Shonda Rhimes, the creator of the show, and the other writers refer to them as Mer/Der. I think it is funny that when you say that it sounds like "murder", which is what I feel like doing.

Maybe it is a good thing that we are off for the summer now, because I need a break from this crap, it is sucking me in too much.

But, as a final shot, if George ends up messing up what he has with Callie, I'm going to be hacked. I mean, she went through all that trouble to help Meredith on the dog cancer thing because she wanted to be nice to George's "family". How sweet is that? Don't mess up, or I'm coming for you, George! :-)


At 5/18/2006 9:56 AM, Blogger Kristi said...

Uggh. The finale left me nauseous.

Meredith deserves all of the unhappiness she gets. Finn was interested. He is intelligent, hot, caring. She is an idiot.

Speaking of idiots. Hello, Izzie! What a piece of work. Wow. Throwing away a career because she was impatient.

I am starting to like Addison more and more.

I also hope that George doesn't mess things up with Callie. She seems to really care for him.

IMHO, the whole prom thing was a bit over the top. A little too much for me.

Sorry for the rant. I just had a lot of crap building up in my mind about this episode.

At 5/18/2006 10:01 AM, Blogger loelsh said...

Yeah, I was not happy about the whole Izzy breakdown. I did hear that a cast member would be leaving. Maybe she did decide to do something else. Maybe she's looking for big screen rolls.

At first, I was for the Mer/Der thing, but like Kristi, Addison is growing on me. I'm still up in the air about how I'd like to see things go down, but I think the Dith made a big mistake. She's messing things up for herself.

At 5/18/2006 10:50 AM, Blogger Princess21 said...

The Izzie fit is me in a nutshell! I loved it...cause I would so do that!!

I thought it was a great show! I am a fan of the Mer/Der thing!! She loves him...he loves her....makes perfect sense! That way I can have Finn!! :)

I think George needs a make over next season. Ick!!

At 5/18/2006 11:15 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

I really hope Izzie isn't gone for good...I love her!!! She's the main reason I started watching the show in the first place (cause she was on one of my fav shows Roswell).

Btw, I love Callie and if George hurts her in any way, he's gonna get a Trin beating!!!

At 5/18/2006 3:59 PM, Blogger loelsh said...

What? PJ? You think my George needs a make over? I think he's totally cute!

I kinda like his new hair cut. It's kind of old fashioned. Like he belongs in a movie from the 40's or something.

I also like the George/Callie thing. They should keep that going for a while.

At 5/18/2006 5:07 PM, Blogger Princess21 said...

Lo...he just does not do anything for me!! Sorry!!!

I do luv the Callie/George relationship! I think she is totally cute!

I do NOT like Addison!! And most of it is because of her hair!! What is up with it anyway?? Geesh!!

At 5/20/2006 10:49 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

I never liked George's new chick, not even from the beginning. I was overjoyed that he could finally finish pining for Meredith but his new girl irks me to pieces!

Izzie's melodrama is also driving me crazy, though I did like Denny.

And I think EVERYONE is furious over Meredith and Derek. Maybe the producers will pay attention to the fans and decide to start off the new season saying that Meredith just dreamed the whole thing up?


Post a Comment

<< Home

The Afterlife

Three guys -- Carl, Bob and Brett -- found themselves in Hell, a little confused about their present situation. They were startled to see a door in the wall open, and behind the door was perhaps the ugliest woman they had ever seen. She was 3'4", dirty, and you could smell her even over the Brimstone.

The voice of the Devil was heard, "Brett, you have sinned! You are condemned to spend the rest of eternity in bed with this woman!" And Brett was whisked through the door by a group of lesser demons to his torment.

This understandably shook up the other two, and so they both jumped when a second door opened, and they saw an even more disgusting example of womanhood gone wrong. She was over 7' tall, monstrous, covered in thick black hair, and flies circled her.

The voice of the Devil was heard, "Carl, you have sinned! You are condemned to spend the rest of eternity in bed with this woman!" And Carl, like Brett, was whisked off.Bob, now alone, felt understandably anxious, and feared the worst when the third door opened. And as the door inched open, he strained to see the figure of ... Cindy Crawford. Delighted, Bob jumped up, taking in the sight of this beautiful woman, dressed in a skimpy bikini. Then he heard the voice of the Devil saying:

"Cindy, you have sinned."


At 5/18/2006 11:02 AM, Blogger Witness Street said...

Haha, this cracked me up! Seriously.

At 5/20/2006 10:46 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

BWAHA! I snorted out loud. :)


Post a Comment

<< Home

Tuesday, May 16, 2006


Guru's Dunce Cap

Okay, that cap is for me. I'm an idiot. Sunday night, the wife and I had plans at some friends' house and we wanted to DVR our shows. I checked the guide and saw that the Survivor finale was going to be on all evening, so we didn't need to record.

That's right. You swift readers noticed that Survivor is on CBS and my shows are on ABC, so we missed them. We also forgot that last night was the finale, since we weren't reminded by watching ABC on Sunday night.

We caught most of the finale last night, but right now, I am downloading my missed episodes of Grey's Anatomy and Desperate Housewives and will burn them to disk so that we can catch up. How big of an idiot am I? (Rhetorical question, please don't answer!"


At 5/16/2006 9:27 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

At least you are working on getting them...cause GA was fantastic!!! ABC even showed Sunday night episode right before the two hour finale last night.

At 5/16/2006 11:31 AM, Blogger Princess21 said...

OMGosh!!! Is all I can say!! I am in disbelief!! OMGosh!!!!

At 5/20/2006 10:45 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

No more of an idiot than I am. Eric and I totally missed the finale too because of the pre-empting presidential speech.

Once we finally caught it, though? We weren't at all impressed.

But you know all this already. I'm so slow.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Monday, May 15, 2006


Prime Movie Poster

Lo and I rented a couple of movies this past week. One of them was Prime. In case you need a refresher, this is the movie where the older woman starts dating a younger man. It turns out that the younger man is the son of her therapist, who has to listen to her talk about their sex lives and suffer in silence. Hilarity ensues.

This movie started out pretty well, but it just would NOT end. The characters got old and boring and the "resolution" at the end of the movie was crap. I would not recommend that anyone watch this movie, free or not. You will have just wasted precious hours of your life.

I don't know if Lo has a different view of the movie (for the female perspective), but I'm pretty sure that she doesn't plan to buy it.

Any of you seen it? What did you think?


At 5/15/2006 11:36 AM, Blogger Princess21 said...

I saw this movie a while back...with A...he was asleep...but still with me while I watched it. He claims to have hated the movie...but only saw the beginning and the end. So he does not really count.

I, on the other hand, did enjoy the movie. It was a bit on the long side....and the end was horrible....but the whole idea was good.

Ok...I am not a good judge of movies...I like almost anything!

But I would not watch it again or buy it....but did not hate it!

At 5/15/2006 12:07 PM, Blogger Guru said...

PJ, it's okay if you like almost anything.

I agree with you the idea was good. I was pretty excited to see the movie. The horrible ending really made me so mad at the movie that I am prevented from liking it.

At 5/15/2006 12:14 PM, Blogger loelsh said...

I thought it was okay. It seemed to move a bit slow. I was not impressed with the ending either. I definately won't be buying it.

At 5/16/2006 12:29 AM, Anonymous nicole said...

I haven't seen it but I'm laughing at this sentence, "...but it would NOT end."

At 7/15/2006 11:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

anyone care to explain the ending to me?


Post a Comment

<< Home

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day

A big Happy Mother's Day to all of you mothers out there, especially my baby mama, Lo. She is a fantastic mother and definitely deserves the best. (Unfortunately, she got me!)

Since we have to be at church so early today, I actually took all of the kids out on errands all morning yesterday so that she could sleep in for as long as her body would let her. While we were out, we got her presents, but I won't cover those here, in case she reads this before she gets a chance to open them!

Before I go, again, Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers. Hope you all have wonderful days.


At 5/14/2006 8:04 AM, Blogger loelsh said...

Aw! Thanks honey! And thanks for letting me sleep yesterday. Now that's speaking my love language!

At 5/16/2006 12:28 AM, Anonymous nicole said...

One question: BABY-MAMA??????


Post a Comment

<< Home

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Okay, I'm Weird

So, look. I have this problem and it has to do with batteries. I had sort of realized this quirk about myself, but the other day it really hit home and I think I've got issues.

I'm obsessed with charging things.

No, not like on credit, remember I'm talking batteries. I get some kind of internal, anxietial stress watching things that run on batteries use up their power. For instance, laptops. If I undock a laptop and take it somewhere, I am obsessed with the battery level. Even after I redock, I check that thing like every 5 minutes until it is back to full strength.

Cell phones. Any time that I get near a charger, I have to plug my phone back in. Heaven forbid if I actually get low or run out! I had that happen last Saturday at G's house and fortunately, he had a suitable charger and I'm positive that I had a much better time because of it.

The same goes for my MP3 player, the wireless microphones at church (and their corresponding rechargable batteries), our video camera, etc, anything with a battery meter. I feel like it is my lifeblood ticking away or something (okay, that is a bit of an overstatement) and I just *need* it to be charged up.

Shhhh! Don't tell anyone, or they might just lock me up :-)


At 5/15/2006 10:09 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

You know, constantly recharging li-ion batteries, like the ones in your cell and MP3 player, can actually kill them faster, right? It's best to let them get pretty low and then recharge them.

At 5/15/2006 10:33 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Dude, that just isnt' true.

NiCad batteries had a "memory effect" that would cause them to not last as long if they were charged too often.

Li-Ion batteries do not suffer from that problem. Their biggest issue is with the speed of the charge, not the frequency.

Peep this.

At 5/15/2006 10:45 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Additionally, according to Wikipedia:

If the battery is used and fully depleted to 0 %, this is called a "deep discharge" cycle, and this decreases its capacity. Approximately 100 deep discharge cycles leave the battery with about 75% to 85% capacity. When used in laptop computers or cellular phones, this rate of deterioration means that after three to five years the battery will have capacities that are too low to be usable.

So, letting it pretty much run out is bad times.

At 5/16/2006 12:27 AM, Anonymous nicole said...

Wow, dude. You've definitely got my OCD beat!

But don't worry, we've all got our quirks. It's what makes us speshul. ;)

And at least you can be sure your phone will never run out of power.

At 5/17/2006 2:50 PM, Blogger Gooey said...

Why the hell do you have to be so smart?

Oh well, I've learned a lot from you over the years. I'll just add to that knowledge.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Friday, May 12, 2006

Gas Lines

Coming home yesterday was a nightmare! I noticed that gas had gone up to $2.95 a gallon in several places and knew that I needed to check the old faithfuls of Pilot and Flying J to get the best possible gas price.

The Flying J was rocking a $2.78 a gallon rate and the Pilot station was going for $2.65. Because of the obvious $.30 a gallon savings, Pilot was packed. All of the pumps were being used (there are like 20-25 of them) and people were lined up down the street to get in.

When I got into the lot (the line moved quickly enough because of the number of pumps), I discovered a crappy fact that I had never noticed before. My car's gas tank is on the right and 90% of everyone else's are on the left. Have you ever tried to go the wrong way in a crowded gas line?

My options were to sit on the other side (making people mad who were waiting the one direction) and head in against traffic, or to switch and get my place in line in reverse. I chose the former and went in line.

When it was my turn, some jerkface in a BMW (with Dealer Plates) decided he was going to do some stupid thing and block the middle pass-through lane at the station. So, since I was blocking the person at the pump from going straight, and she couldn't pull out into the pass-through lane - nor could anyone else, and no one in line could go backward because cars were lined up for hundreds of yards, it all fell on BMW-man to move so that order could be restored.

But, Nooooooo! Jerkoff just sat there and only when the whole place was looking murderous did he bother to move. After that, it was smooth sailing and I ended up only being about 20 minutes later than normal heading home, which wasn't too bad considering the rain.

Note to self: Get a car with the gas tank on the left.


At 5/12/2006 11:40 AM, Blogger loelsh said...

That sucks. Our van's gas tank is on the left. At least you were able to save 30 cents a gal. though! There's always at least one jerk in situations like that, it seems!

At 5/12/2006 2:59 PM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

Ah yes, I too have the gas tank on the right, but it's never bothered me...yet!

At 5/12/2006 10:56 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

Gone UP to $2.95?? People around here would KILL to find gas that cheap!

Of course, neither us of can complain considering how high European prices are right now.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Not Chris!

Okay, what the heck is going on here? How in the world did Chris Daughtry get kicked off of American Idol and Katherine McPhee (who freaking SUCKED Tuesday) get to stay on? Are people that hard up to see a chick every week? (Note to the guys, there are girls everywhere!)

I also can't understand the supreme fascination with Taylor. He is entertaining, but not the best singer in the competition and what the heck kind of album is he going to make that is going to go platinum? Do people still buy a million copies of Sam Cooke in a few weeks?

If he does win, I hope that he gets a great producer and they come up with something good and not old and tired. "But, Guru, they wouldn't set the Idols up to fail," you say. "Remember From Justin to Kelly," I reply.

After some searching, I now know why Taylor continues his popularity in the face of much better singers.

Taylor at Vote for the Worst

Maybe Elliott will win and they will clean up his grill and he will be a star, I don't know. Maybe Chris is better off and he will just get to do what he wants and hit with some kind of Matchbox20 / Linkin Park sound that will get tons of airplay on rock and Top 40 stations and it will be great. It could be like season 2 of AI where #2, Clay Aiken, far outsold #1 Reuben Studdard - except this time it will be #4 having the best career of all. That would be sticking it to 'em.


At 5/11/2006 7:32 AM, Blogger Witness Street said...

I agree with everything here except for one thing: you're too kind to call Taylor a Sam Cooke, where I find him to be a poor man's Michael Bolton. But nevertheless, it's a shame to see the real singers have to go. :)

At 5/11/2006 8:36 AM, Blogger Ashburnite said...

I was so upset last night. I literally yelled at the tv. Un-f*cking-believable. I used to somewhat like Kat, but now I hate her- if for no other reason than the fact that SHE should have gone home, not my boyfriend Chris.

At 5/11/2006 9:02 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

I agree that Chris will outsell all the others...I was thinking that last night when he was voted off. I def plan on buying his cd (and no one elses).

At 5/11/2006 9:28 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Witness: Dude, that is classic. I love the Mike Bolton association.

Ash: I obviously like Chris for not all the reasons that you do ;-), but you know I agree.

Trin: G will be supporting Katherine's CD, though, I'll bet.

Well, I was expecting to get blasted some for this post and instead I got some love. That's nice. I hope they don't sit on Chris' CD too long. He needs to start thinking about it right now. I'm sure that people are already contacting him. I know J records gets first crack at offering the Idols contracts and I'll bet that they are already promising to sign Chris as soon as they can. The execs would be stupid not to have producers lined up and studio time purchased.

At 5/11/2006 9:40 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

I wanted to go to the AI concert this August, but now that Chris won't be the winner, I rather not go.

At 5/11/2006 1:39 PM, Blogger A Woman From Illinois said...

I agree! It was a travesty.

At 5/11/2006 2:09 PM, Blogger Serra said...

I posted what I thought of Chris going home on my blog--I really think they're rigging this crap.

At 5/11/2006 2:21 PM, Blogger Princess21 said...

sad...sad....sad!! I still cannot believe they sent him packing!!

The look on his face was just gut wrenching! Can we have a revote please????

But now...all of my energy goes to making Elliot the next AI! You voting...a lot!!! :)

so sad!

At 5/11/2006 3:09 PM, Blogger Guru said...

Trin: He'll still be there, though. You could go and show your support for the "true winner". And while you are there you could give Melissa McGee my phone number.... (just kidding, Lo!)

AWFI: Indeed.

Serra: It was almost like you were in the room as they decided :-)

PJ: That look was very sad. He just knew that he was going to be safe, and then *WHAM*! He was crushed!

At 5/11/2006 3:11 PM, Blogger Guru said...

Trinity Post Script... After careful thought, to make it fair, you should give Ace and Chris Lo's number.

At 5/11/2006 6:17 PM, Anonymous faustina said...

I for one won't be watching to see who wins any longer. I was so sure it would be Chris. He is so much amazingly better than the others. Although Elliot, Katherine, and Taylor have lots of fans and are fun to watch, I don't think they have much record selling power, which Chris has. I know he will probably join a rock band and do well, but if America didn't love him enough to vote him on until the end I don't think they will be there to buy his records either.

At 5/11/2006 7:33 PM, Blogger Guru said...

faustina: The people who vote and the people who buy albums are sometimes completely different people.

Clay Aiken outsold Reuben Studdard by a hundreds of thousands of albums, but was outvoted by a slim margin.

I think a lot of it is personality and maybe people were tired of Chris.

At 5/11/2006 10:06 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

I love Taylor. I love Elliott more than Taylor but I love Taylor.

And he's NOT an ASSHOLE.

I liked Chris but I kinda got tired of him after awhile. Yeah, he's marketable but his sound was the same every single week. Besides, I hear he's the lead singer of Fuel now so no need to cry for him. :)

At 5/11/2006 10:06 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

By the way, Katharine makes me physically ill.

That is all.

At 5/12/2006 11:41 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

The results prove one of two things:

1) The voting is rigged.

2) The majority of America is stupid, based on the comments made here.

Personally? I don't care; I can't stand American Idol anymore. All the previous winners, with the exception of Kelly Clarkson, haven't had much of a career after the fact (in my opinion).

I watched the first two seasons, and Kelly was awesome in the first, and I wanted Clay to win in the second. Clay obviously didn't win, but we heared a lot more out of him in his after-career than we did from Reuben. After seeing a poll a year later, in wich TV guide found that almost 80% of people would go back and vote for Clay if they could, I just thought the whole show was a sham, and didn't care for it anymore.

I only watch the begining now for all the idiots who think they can sing but can't. It's like watching the Special Olympics, but you can laugh and not feel bad.

At 5/12/2006 11:42 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

Oh, and by the stuipd America comments, I wasn't calling all of you stupid, I was saying everyone else is since you all don't agree with them.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

My Shows

Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy were finally both good on the same night again. I remember when Sunday night had to be all about being home at 9pm to catch the best TV block of the week. Then DH went on its little I'll-show-a-new-episode-whenever-I-want-to-and-not-a-second-sooner kick, and I started to lose interest in it.

However, Sunday night, it finally put a little of what made it good back into the show. Bree's son did an incredibly dastardly deed. Bree responded in the most kick butt way.

Great comedic scenes in the Solis household, but the setting has been set for some high drama later.

The Scavo family is about to get pretty interesting again.

Terri Hatcher's house burned down. That didn't suck.

Matthew ended up locked in the basement. Dag, that Applewhite woman is crazy.

And on GA, everyone is all good and rolling along in classic fashion. I'm getting a little tired of Izzie's crap, though. Especially with her response to Callie in the bathroom. (BTW, a lot of blogs give Callie crap for being fat, I think her little topless scene showed that she is just fine in the body department and, IMO, way more appealing than Meredith).

I read the Grey's Writers blog for this episode, written by the show's creator, and she was more interested in the season finale. But, she apparently loved the 'Dith and Izzie's reaction in the bathroom, because it was so real. I'm glad that Callie washed her hands, though.

I am sick of George's friends rejecting his girlfriend, too. They are a bunch of beeyatches for it.

Just when you think you can be proud of Alex for being a great doctor and person, he responds to it like a butt hole. I'll bet that he'll just never be a likeable character. He is like House - except not that good of a doctor and isn't that charming - okay, he is nothing like House. Sorry I said it.

Any of you catch the shows. Thoughts?


At 5/10/2006 7:53 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

I think Callie is very beautiful...unlike nasty looking Meredith (even her voice is nasty)!

And I'm very glad my DH is finally back! I wondered what happened to it. But then again, isn't the season finalle (sp?) next week?

Btw, why would you stick a letter, that you don't want to be seen, into a pile of other letters? Why not just rip it up and throw it away??? Drives me nuts!

At 5/10/2006 10:11 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Yes, Callie is probably the hottest woman on there, in my eyes. Izzie comes in a close second, but I prefer Callie's look.

The problem with DH is that there are only 23 episodes in this season (with 2 recaps for a total of 25), while there are 27 episodes of Grey's Anatomy, not counting any recaps. Less is NOT more here, people!

Lo was screaming about that same thing with the letter.

At 5/11/2006 10:54 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

I was laughing my ass off when the Sciavo's maid thought she had to sleep with Carlos to become pregnant. That was just golden. And Bree's son is such a little shit. I'm so glad that Bree finally woke up and just kicked his ass out. Typical of him to try and justify that he won. Yeah, you're left in the middle of nowhere, with very little money and no ride . . . sounds like a winning situation to me.

Didn't get to watch Grey's Anatomy though, damn Network and Java exams the next day, and studying seemed a little more important. Last exam was yesterday, though, so I might pick it up off mininova later today.

At 5/11/2006 2:05 PM, Blogger Gooey said...

Crap . . . . Joke a friend made was running in my head, and I meant to say Solis.

Exams can really mess with your head, even after you've taken them . . . .

At 5/11/2006 3:07 PM, Blogger Guru said...

Gooey: Yeah, that kid was grasping at straws if he thinks he won. I think he was crushed and he was just trying to save a little face.

Gooey2: It's okay, man. I don't blame you.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Too Far?

Okay, it has gone beyond geeks dressing up for conventions. Now they have gotten their animals in on the game. Doesn't Yoda Dog look thrilled to be playing along?

Spider Dog

Yoda Dog


Three Headed Dog


At 5/09/2006 10:52 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

Okay, that top one kinda freaked me out when I first saw it. But I lurve that chihuahua shot!

It's a shame that I have to say "chy-hooa-hooa" to myself while I type that word...

At 5/10/2006 10:04 AM, Blogger Guru said...

At least you can spell chihuahua. I always bring up google and type my best guess and let google spell check it for me.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Monday, May 08, 2006

Strange Car Commercial

Has anyone seen the commercial for the Toyota Yaris where the car stops in front of a piggy bank? The car then proceeds to use tools to saw away at the piggy bank until finally the car reaches out with a hammer, taps the bank, and the bank splits apart. The car then takes the money inside and puts it inside itself.

Ummmm. What is the point? Usually, you hear that a product won't break the bank. This one does just that. Even more, after that, it gets you for your cheese. So, if I buy this car, it will suck me dry of all of my money?

I'm confused.


At 5/08/2006 8:39 AM, Blogger Trinity13 said...

I hate that commercial!

Maybe it's trying to say that it only takes pennies to run it...I don't know.

At 5/08/2006 3:16 PM, Blogger Princess21 said...

I can't get over the fact that the piggy bank is somewhat's eyes blink and everything....and the car proceeds to murder it for it's one and only penny!!! And then the car clones itself! Big Meanie Ugly Car!!!

At 5/08/2006 11:50 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

I've only seen the commercial where the Yaris runs over the gas pump and sucks out the 3oz of gas that were still in it.

It's admittedly "weird" but the most important thing is that all of us saw it and all of us remember it. In the minds of the advertising execs? The ad was a success. ;)

At 5/09/2006 7:15 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Too bad in my case, it will never transfer to a sale. I don't support places with stupid advertisements.

For instance Quiznos Subs had a dumb one a few years back and I refused to buy a sub during its run.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Sunday, May 07, 2006

First Time

Today was my first Sunday on with our praise band at church. As my loyal readers are aware, I bought a bass guitar of my very own with the intention to get better and play.

I made plenty of mistakes, but my wife didn't notice, so I'll have to figure that most people didn't catch them either. But, all-in-all I played pretty well. The G-Man helped me out with a song last night, working me through a tricky part and re-writing the lead sheets of the song into a format that I am comfortable and familiar with.

When it came time for that song today, I totally rocked it out and it was probably my most impressive playing. So, thx to the G for the help with the practice.

That's it, hope you all had a good weekend.


At 5/08/2006 11:44 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

I had no idea you were such a rocker! Go Guru!


Post a Comment

<< Home

Saturday, May 06, 2006

Jack Bauer

Ever since the Chuck Norris list came out awhile ago, people have been making lists for all sorts of action heroes.

Here is Jack Bauer. Read through, there are some real gems.

When Jack Bauer owes Tony Soprano money, Tony says nothing.

If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.

Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.

If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life.

Jack Bauers calendar goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.

When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack Bauer found it and put it back.

Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.

When President Palmer quit to start doing Allstate commercials, it took him 43 takes before he could stop saying, "You're in good hands with Jack Bauer".

Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.

If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Jack Bauer says its beef. Then it's beef.

Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.

1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.

When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer hates lemonade.

Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.

Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.

Osama bin Laden's recent proposal for truce is a direct result of him finding out that Jack Bauer is, in fact, still alive.

Jack Bauer is the leading cause of death in Middle Eastern men.

Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.

When Jack Bauer was a child, he made his mother finish his vegetables.

There is no such thing as lesbians, just women who never met Jack Bauer.

Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days time. Wait, that is a real fact.

Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.

Simon Says should be renamed to Jack Bauer Says because if Jack Bauer says something then you better do it.

Jack Bauer won the Tour de France on a unicycle to prove to Lance Armstrong it wasn't a big deal. He thinks yellow wristbands are gay.

When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jack Bauer jumps out.

Jack Bauer's favourite color is severe terror alert red. His second favourite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.

You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him drink.

If Rosa Parks was in Jack Bauer's seat, she'd move to the back of the bus.

When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help.

Your attraction to Jack Bauer in no way affects your sexual orientation.

Jesus died and rose from the dead in 3 days. It took Jack Bauer less than an hour. And he's done it twice.

In 96 hours, Jack Bauer has killed 93 people and saved the world 4 times. What the hell have you done with your life?

When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Jack Bauer.

Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.

Jack Bauer can get McDonald's breakfast after 10:30.

Jack Bauer once killed so many terrorists that at one point, the #5 CIA Most Wanted fugitive was an 18-year-old teenager in Malaysia who downloaded the movie Dodgeball.

Guns don't kill people, Jack Bauer kills people.

Every mathematical inequality officially ends with "< Jack Bauer".

In kindergarten, Jack Bauer killed a terrorist for Show and Tell.

Jack Bauer has been to Mars. That's why there's no life on Mars.

Jack Bauer has shot more men in the face than Elton John.

If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make a bomb out of MacGyver and get out.

Superman's only weakness is Kryptonite. Jack Bauer laughs at Superman for having a weakness.

It would only take 1 bullet for Jack Bauer to kill 50 Cent.

People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer.

Jack Bauer literally died for his country, and lived to tell about it.

Jack Bauer knows Victoria's secret.

What color is Jack Bauer's blood? Trick question. Jack Bauer does not bleed.

If you spell Jack Bauer in a Scrabble game, you win. Forever.

If O.J. ever met Jack Bauer, he'd confess.

"Jack Bauer" is Arabic for "I'm f*$ked".

When Jack Bauer pisses into the wind, the wind changes direction.

If Jack Bauer was gay, his name would be Chuck Norris.

Jack Bauer does not sleep. The only rest he needs is what he gets when he's knocked out or temporarily killed.

Jack Bauer makes onions cry.

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, Jack Bauer hears it.


At 5/07/2006 12:36 AM, Anonymous nicole said...

HAHAHA! I especially liked the Arabic translation!

This is hilarious. :)

At 5/07/2006 12:42 AM, Blogger eric said...

nicole pointed this out to me, probably the funniest thing i've read in sometime.

At 5/07/2006 3:44 PM, Blogger Gooey said...

"Jack Bauer got a cat and named it Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris is a pussy."

"Jack Bauer got a female dog and named it Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris is Jack Bauer's bitch."

"WWJD really means What Would Jack Do?"

"The odds of completing anything without Jack Bauer is less than 20%."

"There's the right way, the wrong way, and then there's the Jack Bauer way. The Jack Bauer way is essentially the right way, but faster and with more deaths."

"FOX now begins each episode of 24 with: 'Due to Jack Bauer, viewer discrecion is advised.'"

"Jack Bauer has his own V-Chip rating sub-category."

Seriously though, Jack Bauer is the toughest man on TV, period. I've been watching the man save the world since hour one of season one. I have an addiction, and the name is Jack Bauer.

At 5/09/2006 1:20 AM, Blogger Witness Street said...

This is pretty funny stuff. Maybe that's why Kobe changed his jersey no. to 24. :)


Post a Comment

<< Home

Friday, May 05, 2006

No Need to Worry

But, I was staring to anyway. The free pop at work had run out a few days ago and I heard no discussion about its replacement. We had also had breakfast bars, granola bars, cereal bars, etc., but they were gone, too!

Then, everything broke at once.

My co-workers headed to a restaurant and called back to my boss' cell phone (because I was in a meeting with him) and asked him to ask me if I wanted to join them. He thought it sounded like a good idea, so he and I went over and he ended up buying all of our meals at the restaurant. (If I had known, I would have ordered more :-) )

Then, he hit Kroger and bought a TON of pop, food, and ICE CREAM. Boxes and boxes of Drumsticks and stuff. How cool is that? Fridays rule.


At 5/06/2006 1:27 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

That's awesome. I wish they would do this where I work. I would so do more work if I had some free pop waiting for me in the fridge in the back. We're about to loose a ton of space in the Helpdesk due to new offices being built, so I think we deserve it.

Same sort of thing happened when we went to P.F. Changs for a coworker's going away party. We order food, and the IS department foots the bill. Friggin' sweet.

At 5/07/2006 12:34 AM, Anonymous nicole said...

Hey, you called it POP! I didn't know you were a "pophead." ;)

Wish we got some of that free stuff at work...


Post a Comment

<< Home

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Annoying Class

One of the 3 classes that I am taking this semester is Computer Science 111. I have to take it if I want to get on to the good stuff. However, I will tell you what... so far, it sucks.

Many of you know that I am a computer programmer by trade. I've done it for over five years. So, I am having difficulty wasting my time on what this class calls "an exercise".

It is in Java, which I'm not too excited about because of its similarity to C# (which I work in), because I had hoped to work in a programming language new to me. Anyway, here was a sample question from my first assignment.

Write a program that computes the sum of the first ten positive even integers, 2 + 4 + ... + 20.

From the example, they wanted me to just add the numbers in one line and print it out, like this:
public class Sum10Evens
public static void main(String[] args)
System.out.println(2 + 4 + 6 + 8 + 10 + 12 + 14 + 16 + 18 + 20);

Instead, I can't work that lamely. I had to introduce variables (gasp!) and for loops (dear!). My solution is here:
public class Sum10Evens
public static void main(String[] args)
int sum_of_evens = 0;
int current_even = 2;
for (int i=0; i<10;i++)
sum_of_evens += current_even;
current_even += 2;
System.out.println("The sum of the first 10 evens is "
+ sum_of_evens );

That is much sexier, don't you think?

I hope that this class gets harder, but judging by my textbook, I'm guessing no. On top of that, the book is for my next 3 classes, so none of this work may ever get hard. Maybe by the time I start my masters work...


At 5/04/2006 10:15 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

God, I would have killed my Java instructor if he made me write that program the way it was done in the second example. Way to go, teaching students to write bloated code right from the start. I hate teachers that do the, "learn it the hard way so you can appreciate the short way," method of teaching. Fuck that shit. If my way gets it done faster and uses less code, guess which one I'm going with?

Also, you're an experienced programmer in a 100 level class, so the fact that you thought it would get harder is rather funny to me. Hell, it's just downright funny that you program for a living and are in a 100 level class! Welcome to American education, where even the intelligent can be made to slow down to the pace of a retard.

Check my blog later today. I'll have an interesting perspective on programmers.

At 5/04/2006 11:49 AM, Blogger Guru said...

Ah, I think you mistunderstood me. He didn't make me write the hard one, I did it that way on purpose. The first one was all he wanted. I can't operate at that level as the sum total of my work.

In a workplace environment, I always do The Simplest Thing That Could Possibly Work, but in this case, my ego kicked in some.

I couldn't operate at the idiot level, so instead I made it a little more complex, but at least interesting for me to write.

At 5/04/2006 12:13 PM, Blogger Guru said...

Additionally, I am a proponent of "learn the hard way first", not so you can appreciate the easy way... I don't care about that. It is so you are better at the easy way.

For instance, I recommend learning HTML through notepad or something first. That way, you can use Dreamweaver or some other editor and get in there and change the code to remove bloat and/or do exactly what you want.

I also recommend learning the real "nuts and bolts" of why a programming language does what it does before you learn how to use shortcuts. Knowing the nuts and bolts will bail you out in the real world, count on it.

That is why I am bummed that my school is teaching Java. Joel Spolsky has an excellent rant on why schools shouldn't teach Java as an intro. You can read it here.

I know too many people that only ever learned the easy way and couldn't program/web design/compute their way out of a wet paper bag because they were incapable of acting outside of the box.

Just my two cents.

At 5/04/2006 10:22 PM, Blogger Chad said...

I would have flipped it and bounced it.

Set a loop to run. test to see if num is even- add to summation if it is. break the loop when i have 10 addends.


At 5/04/2006 11:56 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

So basically you're being forced to "learn" something that you pretty much already know. Something that would probably take me my ENTIRE LIFETIME to comprehend?

MAN why can't I be smart??

At 5/05/2006 3:32 PM, Blogger Gooey said...

Oh, yeah, I'm . . . I'm not a morning person. Finals next week aren't really helping either.

C/C++ and Java are offered at the 100 level at ODU, but C is the only one that actually goes into higher levels, per se. The 100 level Java class is needed for the Javascript class later on, but you really only need Java at ODU if your CIS concentratoin is web development, like me.

And don't get me wrong about the "hard way." I see and understand why instructors want to do it that way first, but if I can move on and do it the easy way, while understanding both the hard and easy way, I'd much rather just do it the easy way.

The best programmers are both dumb and lazy.

At 4/27/2009 4:51 PM, Blogger rock1toc said...

Well I am not a programmer but I think we are taking the same course. Your response has verified my answer that I had no other way to find. Yup I googled you and there was your emphatic answer on how easy the class is and fundametally you are totally correct; add in a few explosion and incoming mortar rounds and well it gets more interesting even without the sexy second version of the answer. Yeah I am DL on this class from 6000 miles on the other side of the world in a combat zone. Seeing as you are the expert and I have to save American lives during my day job and only get to deal with an education at night maybe I could look you up as I plow my way through this. POC


Post a Comment

<< Home

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

New Geek Stuff

Well, Jemmers blogged about her new printer, so it isn't too pathetic of me that I'm excited about my new keyboard and mouse at work. Since I have a laptop, I needed a keyboard and mouse to go with my docking station. My boss let me pick anything I wanted from the Staples website.

I chose this Microsoft Ergonomic Keyboard...
Microsoft Ergonomic Keyboard

and this Microsoft Ergonomic Mouse...
Microsoft Ergonomic Mouse

I used to not be such a fan of the ergonomic keyboard when I first encountered one on my friend Chad's desk. But, as I used it (and started getting carpal tunnel symptoms), I started really enjoyed it. So, now I get to enjoy it everyday!

The mouse is a mouse, but I am benefiting from a mousepad with a wrist rest. I normally don't use a mousepad with an optical mouse, but I have a glass desk here at work and they are necessary. Also, the wrist rest helps with the carpal tunnel problems, so I can actually work without being in pain all day long.

Life is good when it can be pain free!


At 5/03/2006 11:06 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

Ugh, I would never buy peripherals from Microsoft. Give me Logitech or give me death! Microsoft doesn't make mice with a high enough DPI for me, and I think Logitech's keyboards look a lot nicer and provide much more functionality.

At 5/03/2006 11:45 AM, Blogger Princess21 said...

Did my post about my new printer almost make me a Geek??? Wow!! So excited!!! :)

Cool new stuff Gu!! Isn't fun to have new stuff....even if it is for work!! I mean...we spend most of our time there anyways!!

YEAH for new stuff!!!

At 5/03/2006 2:07 PM, Blogger Guru said...

Gooey: Well, the mouse has 1000 dpi and is so exacting and sensitive that I had to tone it down in the control panel. I know that doesn't compare to a 1600 or 2000 dpi gaming mouse, but I don't know why I'd pay a ton of extra money for dpi that I wouldn't use. As for the keyboard, one of the things I liked best about this one is how it looks and I don't want extra functionality in my keyboard, in fact I'm a little salty that this one has extra buttons that I don't care about.

PJ: You almost qualified for geek status there. I was so proud of you that day. To your other point, we used to joke with each other at one of my previous jobs that we were a family, since we saw each other more than we saw our own families.

At 5/03/2006 6:36 PM, Blogger A Woman From Illinois said...

I just received my ergonomic wireless keyboard and mouse last Friday. I like it ok. I am not a typist by any means. But it feels more natural. As far as Logitech vs Microsoft, it is like Ford or Chevrolet just a matter of preference. Unless need or productivity plays a roll.

At 5/04/2006 10:22 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

Guru has a point though. With my being a gamer, Logitech makes the devices that give me the performance I need from my peripherals. Sure they cost a lot more, but so does the computer I need to play the games I play. Why did I choose such an expensive hobby?

And guru, your boss said you could order any keyboard and mouse out of the staples catalogue that you wanted. If I worked there, and they had a 2400dpi Logitech mouse, I'd have so gone for it. This is why you never give me a means to an end: I'll take it and run with it.

At 5/04/2006 11:51 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

That one looks MUCH cooler than the one I got.

I bought one of those combo mouse/keyboard sets. The keyboard worked just fine but the mouse totally died. Pissed me off.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Good Day

Today has been an awesome day at work so far. I had a good ride in and I have had enough of my favorite kind of work (straight-up coding) to remain busy doing only that for the entire day. I couldn't ask for more. (Well, an AC that worked or being allowed to wear shorts permanently would be pretty awesome, but I'm not pushing it!)


At 5/02/2006 11:28 PM, Anonymous nicole said...

You almost NEVER read about people's GOOD days at work. I honestly didn't think those existed! Unless you're Donald Trump, anyway...

At 5/03/2006 12:46 AM, Blogger Gooey said...

Hopefully my good days at work (in the future) will be comprised of scripting websites or something. Coding can be fun, but I like designing, so web development fits me like a glove.

At least you had a good day at work, though. I dealt with so many idiots today, I wanted to impale my had with something. Wasn't all bad, though. Got Sr. Fatula psyched about Macs **evil grin**.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Trying to Take It With You

A stingy old lawyer who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness was determined to prove wrong the saying, "You can't take it with you." After much thought and consideration, the old ambulance-chaser finally figured out how to take at least some of his money with him when he died.

He instructed his wife to go to the bank and withdraw enough money to fill two pillowcases. He then directed her to take the bags of money to the attic and leave them directly above his bed. His plan was that when he passed away, he would reach out and grab the bags on his way to heaven.

Several weeks after the funeral, the deceased lawyer's wife had gone up in the attic to clean. Coming upon the two forgotten pillowcases stuffed with cash she exclaimed, "Oh, that darned old fool, I knew he should have had me put the money in the basement."


At 5/02/2006 11:26 PM, Anonymous nicole said...


Of course it took me a second before the punchline sunk in. I know I'm a little slow. ;)


Post a Comment

<< Home

Monday, May 01, 2006

New Camera

Because my wife broke our old digital camera, we had to buy a new one. Our old one was an old HP Photosmart camera and I was very pleased with it. We also already have an HP all-in-one printer with a spot for the camera to plug in, so between those two facts, I decided on getting an HP camera again.

I decided on the HP Photosmart M525.

HP Photosmart M525

You can read the review by clicking the camera name above, but I'll give you a quick rundown on the camera. It takes 6 megapixel pictures, has all sorts of things you can do to the picture in memory - like red eye removal, color changing (black and white, sepia, etc), and adding borders. It also lets you record video with sound and add a soundtrack just to one specific image.

I also scored a 1 gigabyte memory card for it. With that, I can take like 950 pictures, or an hour of video, or somewhere in-between of each. I was really happy with what I paid for it (less than is listed on HP's site) and even more for the memory. A 512mb card was running $35, and the 1 gig card was on sale for $39, so I snatched that bad boy up.

I love getting new electronic toys. It doesn't happen often enough, but when it does, it is a nice treat!


At 5/02/2006 12:28 AM, Anonymous nicole said...

I'm so jealous -- I want a new camera pretty bad, too. Not that there's anything wrong with my old one. I bought it back in like 2000 or 2001 so it's only 2 megapixels. It's also pretty clunky and doesn't fit easily into a pocket book. Hence why I almost never remember to take it with me during my travels.

Gripe, gripe, gripe! ;)

Congrats on your new purchase!

At 5/02/2006 9:09 AM, Blogger Guru said...

If you really want a new one, just drop your old one and break it. That is a great excuse to get a new one!

At 5/03/2006 6:43 AM, Blogger Witness Street said...

Congratulations on the great buy (now I have to ignore the temptation to buy a new one myself)!

You mentioned something about so many tweaking options on the camera, but nevertheless I'd like to recommend an easy-to-use program called Picasa ( I just think it's worth mentioning, because sometimes it makes me look like a professional. :)

Hope all your photos would come out fantastic! :)

At 5/03/2006 2:35 PM, Blogger Guru said...

Witness: I think Picasa is a great product. I probably overkill it a bit by using Photoshop, but I've had to use it in my work plenty of times and I am very comfortable with it. Maybe I'll download it again, though, since it might be easier for my wife to work with than Photoshop, though she does a great job cropping and resizing in Photoshop, I'm proud of how geeky she is getting!


Post a Comment

<< Home

Name: Pete
Home: Columbus, Ohio, United States
See my complete profile

Who links to me?